The Most Meaningful Spiritual Practice...For Me
About 15 years ago I went to coffee with a friend and during the course of our conversation she shared with me a spiritual practice I had never heard of, and immediately knew I wanted to make part of my life.
She was in a training to become a spiritual director, a term I had never heard before. As she described it to me my soul lit up and I felt a connection to the practice before ever experiencing it.
I’ve been in and around the world of spirituality and spiritual practices for my whole life and moved more deeply into it more than 25 years ago. I haven’t tried everything, but I’ve learned about, experienced, tried on, taught more spiritual practices than I could even begin to count. Some resonate with me, while others don’t seem to connect with me as well.
Spiritual direction (spiritual companioning, anam cara, contemplative coach, etc) is a different kind of spiritual practice and places relationship at the center. The term “spiritual director” feels outdated and clunky to most who practice it, but it is challenging to communicate this field of work with a simple title.
A spiritual director is a person who provides guidance, support, and companionship to individuals seeking to deepen their spiritual journey, explore their faith, and develop a closer connection with the divine or their inner self. Spiritual direction is a practice that exists within various religious and spiritual traditions, including Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, and more. The role of a spiritual director is to create a safe and nonjudgmental space for the individual to explore their spiritual experiences, questions, doubts, and aspirations.
The relationship between a spiritual director and the person seeking guidance is characterized by trust, openness, and mutual respect. The spiritual director typically listens attentively and asks probing questions to help the individual reflect on their experiences, beliefs, and emotions. Through this process, the individual can gain insight, clarity, and a deeper understanding of their spiritual path.
With roots reaching back to Celtic spirituality a spiritual director might be called an “anam cara”. An "anam cara" is a Gaelic term that translates to "soul friend" in English. It refers to a deep and spiritual concept in Celtic spirituality, particularly in Irish and Scottish traditions. This concept is rooted in the belief that human beings are meant to connect deeply with one another, recognizing and affirming the divine spark within each individual.
After my initial introduction to the concept of spiritual directors, I immediately reached out to find my own, and quickly began looking for spiritual director training programs so that I could become one. Everything about this concept felt aligned with who I am, how I move in the world, and how I experience the Divine. I have always been someone who connects with God most through my interactions with others.
Since then I have consistently had a spiritual director of my own. After 3 years of training I have been meeting with others as a spiritual director for more than a decade. It is by far the most meaningful spiritual practice I engage for myself, and it is deeply meaningful to sit with others and hold sacred space.
My spiritual directors have carried me through my biggest life transitions, highs and lows, and have sat with me, witnessing my humanity and calling forth the Divine spark within me when I feel I’ve lost sight of it.
While I’m trained as a Certified Spiritual Director you’ll see more recently that I go by Contemplative Coach. Like I said earlier, it is a difficult profession to title in a way that makes sense to people, and Contemplative Coach is the one that feels most authentic to my practice and how I show up.
If you’re curious about spiritual direction or what it’s like to work with a contemplative coach please reach out! It is my passion, and one of the ways I believe we can heal the world.
“Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.”
― David W. Augsburger